sometimes when you bring the thunder you get lost in the storm
I hate bills.
Like ones you have to pay or people named William?
I woke up this morning under my fitted sheet and my legs through the sleeves of my sweater.
sometimes i look at this picture of your cock before i go to sleep, there's something comforting about it
i just hate vaginas for liking penis's insside them
His facebook status was woke up with a whale ..... Captain AHAB IS BACK !!!!!
He kept telling me how extraordinarily clean my ears were.
i have 90 minutes to kick this food poisoning or josh's first experience with buttsex will be his last
I passed out in all my clothes. like my purse too..and with a cup of water next to me..and my last tweet last night was "Bye."
We got buck wild in our animal onesies last night. You kept ripping off your tail in angry rages.
Well the other day she asked me how often I jerk off. So I guess things are getting semi-serious
not that i'm not about exploiting men for money
Unintionally got shitfaced at study group this week. The waitress brought out a fishbowl of long Island iced tea. Challenge accepted.
I'll explain later but I just had to legally commit to abstinence for the next 4 months
So how do u get your coat out of the coat room when someone is fucking on it?
Randomize
