he said my vag tasted like ravioli n pennies... i forgot I was on my period
I wish life was like the Sims. Right when you're pregnant the music would play and I would just know instead of agonizing for the next two weeks.
...so how do you feel about living with a lesbian next year?
hhaha i just laughed out loud when i read that
is that a "i laughed because im fine with it" or "im a republican" ?
You were doing downward dog and puking off my deck at the same time.
well apperantly i passed out on the stairs shouting "victory".
She made me take my shoes off outside her room but she didn't make me wear a condom. I am confused.
I just wanted to share with you that my life has come to naked arts and crafts, to fix my flask, with a rum and coke in my hand... Good luck on your exam
we got her to the bathroom intime. all she could say was 'now my bladder is empty just like my soul'
There would be some who claim I got a little "carried away" or that we "probably don't need that many jello shots". They would be wrong.
hahahaha what do we need the kangaroos for? please tell me we release them instead of doves
You walked up to me, grabbed my face and said "I just peed in the sink!"
call me with an emergency in 5 min. This chick has a strap on hangin behind the bathroom door.
I might be offended if you don't bang me tomorrow. You know, for America.
I don't have the resources to adequately explain this. I need like a Powerpoint presentation and also Vodka.
The magician guy on probation is here at the bar. I'm gonna get him to show me a trick
Randomize
