I guess there's a 50 percent chance that it was her that wet my bed.
How are you feeling today?
i could've thrown up on command at any point today...
My dad is drinking wine out of a measuring cup. This explains so much.
98% is good enough for me. Kinda like birth control. Worth the risk
You kept telling me how warm your bag of vomit was and asked me if i wanted to feel.
next time we make out at a concert please try to refrain from screaming out our hotel room number.. the amount of guys that knocked on our door after you passed out was ridiculous
You know how I said I'd never worry about my roommate? Well I just walked in on her masturbating to Star Trek.
Did she boldly cum where no one has cum before?
Tell the cops to let you through! Tell them you need to do drugs!
its the pipe that keeps on giving. Just when I think it's done, I scrape just enough. It's a st. Patrick's day miracle!
I don't know what she looks like but I'm pretty sure she has a pussy.
I just gotta say that I feel so much better now that I got some. I mean I feel like a normal functioning adult ready to contribute to society.
I woke up with the gnarliest cold/hangover combo
Thats what u get when u have butt ass naked rooftop sex at night in december
Worth it.
On a scale of 1-10, how inappropriate is it to sneak into someone's box of sex toys and put googly eyes on their vibrator?
There's something about a foam party that makes freshman want to turn their lives into full blown shit shows. And I'm ok with the fact I am one of those.
On a scale of one to 10 how Risky is it to sleep with a married man (all morals set aside)
Randomize
