bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
a kid in a transformers shirt tried to pick me up last night at work. he also rolled up on a bicycle, the kind with pedals. do i look that easy?
we got a new version of the plan b at the pharmacy now. its called next choice. you would think they would come up with better names for these things.
Your dick is once again the conversation topic.
Sometimes i look at the biltmore estate and wonder just how small George Vanderbilt's penis was...
let's get her a shirt that says "i went to key west for spring break and all i got was this illegitimate child."
They let you pick the name that they announce for you at graduation. The professional world needs to prepare itself for papa smurf mcdonald.
I bruised my spine.. Jungle gyms were clearly not meant for sex.
don't do it for the experience, do it for the story. now get your ass in that bedroom
How frowned upon is it to take your vibrator into the tanning bed...because Operation: dripping wet is in full swing and I have a busy schedule
it's gotten to the point where I just look in my closet, think, "which article of clothing behaves most like a towel?" and then just go with that
Woke up with an entire pizza face down in my bed beside me... untouched. Never beer bong a whole bottle of wine.
He walked into the bar with a pineapple and they served him AND the pineapple
While the cops were busting my party one of them said. O you have an Xbox? Do you play online? Whats your gamertag?....
I can't decide which is the most disgusting: emily having sex on the stairwell of a frat, michelle shaving her vagina with a razor she found in a frat bathroom, or me getting fingered on the dance floor by some rando. opinions?
Randomize
