Girls gone wild is like the hills, except sexy and it doesnt suck
Do they fuck in the end of "Lady and the Tramp" or am i just wasting my time
i just got a clause named after me in the 'alcohol and drug use' section of the handbook. this is certainly a warning sign.
When she can manipulate the direction of her leg hair, you know its time to leave
It was the worst sex ever. All she did was tap on my balls with her hands like she was in a reggae band.
This is a pre-sorry for hitting on and then sleeping with you're ex
apparently it's a turnoff if you ask a guy why he thinks he needs to use magnums
Don't forget ur talking to the master juggler. Remember that time I slept with 3 guys and made them all pay for plan b? Paid the rent didn't I?
Then my perve supervisor asked about your vagina. And I was like nunya, but its glorious
You can achieve whatever you wish in your imagination with some help from drugs
My cousin is passed out in my room, so I just masturbated in my walk-in closet. Apparently I get off on danger. Make note of that.
I just did the walk of shame in monkey slippers in the snow
Teach me the song of your people
he called me his ex's name during sex then proceeded to cry while still in me
I've turned into a small time drug dealer, now who's the real MVP.
I woke up in a bathtub full of green and blue Nickelodeon slime! wtf?!
Randomize