i have it on good authority that she is not as good at giving head as she claims she is
week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
I got fingered by sexual harassment panda last night, by a van, I can't remember if he took off his furry panda hands...
A female Wisconsin fan just headbutted the bouncer. Im deeply terrified and oddly aroused at the same time.
i just realized that fran drescher is the 90's version of a guidette.
i don't think it's normal to still be missing spring break.
I worked with a girl tonight that recognized me solely from a keg stand she witnessed me do sophmore year. Needless to say this made my night
you sat up and said "i'm the worst kind of roommate, the drunk kind"
They just caught the deck on fire and I ran out with cups off the beer pong table filled with water from the toilet. It was the closest water source.
Note to self glow in the dark nail polish can be quite the mood killer during sex especially when you notice its working for the first time and you stop everything your doing to do spirit fingers
I'm concerned I'll look like a hooker on new years eve in this outfit
There are different standards on new years eve. To look like a hooker you literally need to be giving a guy head on the street while he's handing you cash.
OMG HIS EYES ARE POOLS OF SEX. HOT SEX.
PAAAANTS ARE FOR AAAASSHOLES
Is he gonna be my crazy ex? Cause we weren't even together for as long as my weeklong bicurious lesbian relationship.
New one isn't as good asmy ex. She won't put her tongue up my butt
Peter this is your "ex"
I stand by what i said
Randomize
