Ok forget what i said about christmas break being awful. Chasing shots with fudge
You're so wise. You're like my sexual Grandmother Willow.
It's like I'm in a vicious cycle of noncommittal penis.
It's like split custody, only he's not a kid and they have sex with him.
You left me with no money to have random Chicago sex. The least you can do is pick me up an egg mcmuffin on your walk of shame back to the hotel.
like he said he was barking at you while cumming in your face
I was high fiving everyone. I even high fived with the wall for doing such a good job suporting the ceiling and keeping us alive.
Challenge: Try to have your balls hanging out in every picture you take tonight
Challenge Accepted
Fell down the metal stairs and some guy tried to fight me after you left. I fell asleep with cadbury eggs in my mouth too.
I woke up hugging a box of cheerios that had "wonder woman" written in sharpie on it. So much for a sober night.
We were wearing togas. So having sex was really easy to do without taking any clothes off.
If we had a dog do you think we would be less hoe-y?
Nah
So, then you thought it was a good idea to dress up like the Hamburglar, buy a bag full of McDonalds hamburgers, go to Burger King and throw them at everyone while screaming "HAMBURGLAR!". At that point there was no stopping you.
Anyways enough about genital fatigue...
This is why I can't take dates to shows... I've literally made out with everyone in this band. And two of the guys in the crowd. And the bartender.
Randomize
