it's not the walk of shame if you do it in cowboy boots.
so he made me dinner last pm @whch point i askd if i could help out. he hands me his fucking laundry and asks me 2 do it
only you. it could only happen to you.
Every time I think about it I can feel His toe in my mouth and I gag, I'm scarred for life.
Your boobs are like a big quesadilla marker
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
that was THE gayest party i've ever been to
To be fair, the theme was Cabaret. I don't know what you were expecting.
Yup. Can I borrow your penis decanter for my Xmas party on Saturday
Is it socially acceptable to be blind drunk at half five on a Monday afternoon?
Which pub are you in?
Btw his name is Woody. I must be really drunk to think this is a good situation
Hired a new intern today and we have something in common. I blew her boyfriend in high school. Do you think she knows?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I sprayed his whole room with my perfume and left lots of my hair on the bed. So now if he does bring her home, the bitch will know this territory is marked.
You can now call me Rabbi, and I can now perform weddings, funerals, and other services in all fifty states. You're welcome, world.
Im drunk taking pregnancy tests with this really hot girl...i dont know what is happening
I just want this to serve as a reminder in the morning that the topic of conversation at last call was the penis size of jesus.
You think you can just send me a picture of your dick and everything will be ok?
Yep.
Fuck you bitch. You're married. You got a live-in dick at home for your needs. I still gotta surf this shitty town's bars for cock
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