Holy wow, I found all the old poems u wrote me back when we were in looooooooove...just sort of wild to look back on, thought u'd like that
i kinda do this "flirt with girls and pretend to be a hot white guy named chris" thing
he gave me an orgasm. multiple times. the weird stuff he did in middle school is now irrelevant.
Eliza got arrested. What's the protocol on eating an arrested person's sandwich?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wish I could attach your penis to someone I like more than you.
Homegirl just dropped a candle on the floor major party foul. Thought it make you feel better.
Hahhaha I literally just rolled outta bed and went to get beer in my pj's and slippers. God I love graduating
YOU GOT KINKY WEIRD ICE CREAM HEAD ON FRIDAY DONT EVEN COMPLAIN.
Like do you hear me I PUKED IN MY OWN HANDS AND HE STILL SAID I WAS GORGEOUS
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That would be an interesting position... Not entirely certain how that'd work!
Gravity is no match for my libido
i was talking to them for like 5 mins and they were like HEY LETS GET A PICTURE and tequila said it was good idea
I'm beginning to think the entirety of my appeal is due to the size of my ass.
Its not often you get to say, "The security guard at my job is my new drug dealer," but as of last night, I get to say it.
If you dont get laid dressed as Woody Harrelson in Zombieland, I have lost all faith in the men of nw Indiana.
I AM DRUNK AND AGGRESSIVE ABOUT CURLING!
The US is in the finals, aren't they.
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