I'm not really sure actually. until I fell in love with a boy (which was just a few weeks ago) I thought my attraction to men was purely physical.
so you were gay...and then you realized you were EVEN MORE gay
You may see me on espn tomorrow drunk, half naked, and selling articles of clothing to rich cougars like i did last year, but i will NOT be drinking shitty beer
Until last night, I had never actually thrown up ON a sandwich
I am sitting here. Drinking from a bottle of vodka. Eating shredded cheese from a bag and waiting on him to pick me up after he finishes with his girlfriend. This is what dreams are made of.
Nope. He totaled my car then moved back to Louisiana to work things out with baby mama. I sure know how to pick em
Tiny.
I mean tony. It's like autocorrect knows he wasn't well endowed.
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
He ran into the surf holding up a cigarette yelling "let the Olympic games begin!" So no, no vodka left.
Well while you were being a dick I was taping back together a cougars broken heart
Doing a small happy dance cause my cocaine successfully went through airport security
Have you ever drank bourbon in your underwear while wearing a Santa hat and reflecting on the decisions of your life? Asking for a friend.
She passed out in my baby sister's room so we put her in one of my grandma's diapers, put a pacifier in her mouth, put her in my sister's crib and took pictures.
Just don’t be like me and break up between Christmas and NYE and then get blackout on NYE and puke in your undies.
sorry didn’t mean to call you, i was just trying to put the t-rex emoji beside your name
I bought him flowers and fake vampire fangs, cuz there's really not a greeting card that says "Sorry I got wasted last night and started a very sloppy bloodletting ritual.".
Randomize
