I'm so bored and have no one to sexy text
I wanna do crazy things to you in a tent
fuckk wrong person
.. who was that for? a girlscout?
Come 10 years my vagina won't look like this. I must cherish it
he told me he expects me to keep the fangs on when i go down on him. presumptuous, yes, but man after my own heart.
All of our toilets in my house are broken. Thank God I've practiced peeing in the sink enough.
I think theres a high possibility i could be flammable.
The first couple times was just weird, but after last night, I'm beginning to think you have a real problem banging pregnant women who are carrying someone elses child.
Haha jealous. If I could remember my dreams I'm pretty sure they would constantly be about being drunk in foreign countries
I don't hate him I just hate being present to see him consume 80 dollars worth of alcohol and then try to tip people with left over money on a Walmart gift card
That's not your dick yours is smaller. Nice try.
Wait why do you have a pic of someone else's dick in your phone?
Yeah but then I feel like it's worth it like bro you just stabbed me the least you can do is get me a fuckin otter pop.
It's Reggie from Taco Bell, send me a pic.
True strength comes from lack of pants
Is it sad or funny that I just bought two pregnancy test at the dollar store to give away to people on New Year's Eve while driving for Uber.
just answer this one ? for me. why is there human shit in my shower right now?
Randomize
