What happened to our ballroom dancing plans
I may not go down in history, but i will definitely go down on your little sister.
I just saw fred flintstone in my fruity pebbles!
what drugs are you on?
none, cept for the pain medication i got prescribed by the doc: it said 2 pills every 3 hours, but I took 6 cuz i'll be away from home later
can you explain why there is a dead rabbit in my front seat?
idk, I had a turtle in mine.
This morning my doorman told me it was an accomplishment for me to be standing and conscious after last night.
Just found a keg and a mini-bike in our garage, this couldn't possibly go wrong
my mom sold the house because of the grow room the couple saw i had in the basement.
You did a strip tease for the toilet.
I'm crying, drinking alone and applying for jobs tonight. I figure the alcohol will lower my job standards.
Hows the party lookin?
At a live sex show right now. Not sure about the employee party
I never actually go in the club. I get in line, hit on a chick, and convince her to come drink all she wants for free at my house.
YO I WASNT TRYING TO MAKE A PASS AT YOU.... Or Jesus
What, so now you are his nutritionist and his fuck buddy?
There's hope in those eyes, for a better tomorrow or more cocaine, we may never know, but there's hope.
i'll...probably just offer you drugs?
i'll...probably take them in all honesty
Randomize
