Is putting "Tonight I'm Fucking You" on my date playlist too forward?
Just took last nights make up off with a sock. That hungover.
Moment of the day: as we leave the restaurant, she reaches into my pocket, pulls out her panties, and angrily marches to her car. I felt like a sketchy magician.
That's actually a fantastic idea... The kinky sex dungeon will be vastly improved by the addition of a lightsaber
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
some people popped out of a houseboat and asked us to their party. their houseboat IS A WEEDBOAT. it is full of weed they grow weed. EVERYWHERE.
I think cutting a patient out of a owl costume is a first for those guys. It's a good story at least.
I'm never drinking again. I saw way more penises than I ever cared to see last night. And I've decided that I'm going to live in Scotland.
I need an explanation for both of these epiphanies.
All i remember his him yelling yahtzee while pouring beer down her shirt .
What!? It's 7:30am on gameday. This keg is not going to drink itself.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just got nudes while talking in the third person. Not sure if I Should be proud or ashamed.
Give me a minute. I'm trying to buy moonshine from a railroad worker named "Cowboy."
Sounds good. I'm hoping to have my life together by next week but you never know I guess.
I feel like sleeping with foreign people is a long term investment. It's like a time share. Now when I go to London I have a place to stay.
The playlist was "songs to sing in the shower". I literally got fucked to Footloose.
Just filed for child support I hope he gets the paperwork on Father's Day
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