So ignoring my calls doesnt work if you update your facebook a minute later.
he just said he was sorry he wasnt been able to come by more often coz things are really crazy with that girl
you mean his girlfriend
so the chest pain/shortness of breath/overdose guy we just took to tm hospital is now running down market street from the police in a gown holding his iv.
just put cider in my bong. gotta love fall
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think i accidentally made vodka pancakes
They should try giving mcdonalds to cancer patients because it just cured the worst hangover ive ever had
You just kept saying "they don't make cigarettes for squirrels. Yet."
while she was riding me, she looked at me and said "this is why mom told me learning how to ride a horse would be important for my future"
yeah we're mixing orange juice, vodka, and rum and calling it Oj Simpson On Trial
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We were suposed to have a 3some in their bathroom but it just turned into us 2 making out while he watched like a little kid on christmas morning
We are buying drugs from a guy with a Jesus fish on his dodge caravan.
This guy is clearly nuts his idea of a hangover cure is a six pack poured into a camelpack then hiking 3 miles with a weighted vest. He said "learned it in the army i guess drink beer beat the heat"
"This is Emily. She likes potatoes. And sometimes laughs and cries at the same time, and has a wonderful butt"
Masturbating to the DNC live stream. Not my proudest moment
When your guy changes his swinger profile to include you. #makingprogress
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