Just wana tell you im wearing assless jorts tonight. Ive been waiting my whole life for this.
does it count as cheating if I'm bettering him for his girlfriend?
If I brought two seashells to Lowe's, do you think that they'd drill two holes in each shell for me? I need to be a mermaid on Saturday...
Still borderline I believe. As bad as this sounds, I feel God owes me one here and should not let his grandmother die till after my birthday
Well, I plan on starting the night dressed as little red riding hood. Then I plan on finishing the night dressed as a shit show in a red cape.
Nothing like wearing your heels and smelling like henney in the afternoon
Covered in confetti and bad decisions
Dumb decision of the night...walking home drunk and smelling my pepper spray
I still regret not being there for your blackout into the dumpster last year
Well he was saying something about being emotionally unavailable since his dad died, but then I blew him in a tree and he shut up
I have to shave my legs first. I'm afraid tiny woodland creatures will fly out if he tries touches them.
I fucked him twice and then he set me up with his teammate. This kid does wonders for me
BRING KITTENS I AM A GENIUS
I just spent the last three days trying to hook up with a dude for his pool privileges
The clothing optional portion of the night began around midnight. Then we did disgusting things to each other. It was beautiful.
If a guy makes a dick joke within 24 hrs of matching am I just setting myself up for disaster if I say yes to a date lol
Randomize
