It was just so hard to get through Conan without crying like a baby. I'm just so proud of him.
he was dropping me off and i told him i had to go to the bathroom and i leaned into kiss him and he asked how i went to the bathroom with a tampon up there... he was amazed that their was a third hole...and wanted me to show him where it was
I couldn't tell if those girls from the bar were lesbians or just awesome
oh yea it is. i was not expecting to look at a snowbank and just see flying mushrooms
Did they have a limo or was i just stoned?
also bought condoms to give away to people who look like they're about to make a bad halloween decision. I'm like a fairy.
I think I ate my cheesy fiesta potatoes cup.
By the taste of his semen he isnt vegetarian and therefore lied to me to take me home on a brighter note i stole his fondue set
Is it acceptable to cry on a Friday or am I supposed to drink to forget it?
So drunk I thought the door was feeling me up for a seconds
Also I am throwing a blaZer over what I wore to bed and calling it an outfit.
I was going to be upset with you on moral grounds but then i realized free chocolate was involved
I feel like the first time i have to use my accident insurance its going to be in some sex mishap with you.
All I need to do is acquire a Shrek costume.
Please don't traumatize your girlfriend too terribly. Have fun.
Which one have i been cheating ON and which one have i been cheating WITH if i met them the same night & have been dividing time equally?
Randomize
