You should see what I'm doing to your stuffed animals
Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
She said she didn't have time to shave "there"
Then she shouldn't have had time to order the lobster.
Packing for the trip... do they take Visa in South Dakota?
Apparently she doesn't appreciate the significance of eskimo sisterhood as much as I do.
That's two mile stones in one shot. A ginger and that's my third ashley.
Remember...the emancipation proclimation is your favorite document, you love asian women, japanese food is the tits, and you willfully employ as many latinos as possible...
I was late because I helped this old romanian lady mow her lawn at 2AM.
Any time you can't remember a night, and you wake up in a sorority house, it's fucking worth it.
After last night I think its official. Deep down, we like alcohol more than we like women.
You kept sacrificing me last night. You would just yell out "Virgin Sacrifice!!" and then throw me into a circle of men.
Funny how the post-sex UTI lasted longer than the entire relationship.
I just remembered you petting my nose last night to help the cocaine 'sink in'. I don't think that's how it works
I just want to nap and funnel a bottle of wine in a cute dress
I'm not snubbing your weed I just had a really important rack of ribs to get home to
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