I love sluts.
I end my prayers with that every single night.
so he was shitfaced and kept using sticky notes to label everything like "beer spill" and "going to fuck later"
You guys were grinding to YMCA. I knew you were going to hook up with him.
Apparently I fed my Plan B to my turtle last night.
You kept saying "sir officer" which would have been polite and helped you if it wasn't a female. She was pissed.
If him repeating sorry while thrusting isn't makeup sex than I don't know what else is
The trees feel like magic. Come fly to taco bell with me.
I drunk-cried for all conjoined twins everywhere the other day.
Can you rollerblade?
No, why?
Honestly, I was high and picturing us roller blading together. I wanted to see if I could make my dreams a reality.
She had like a side ponytail and hoop earrings though. And legwarmers. Like a horrible 80s nightmare. Don't drink and dream, dude.
Idk woke up on the suite in someone else's clothing and actually broke my ankle
If me saying "come f***k me now" is talking, then yes.
It was a strange night. I made out with his college roommate and said "do you care?" beforehand.
Bring shot glasses to the final. Don't ask questions.
Eventually I will start sleeping with people who actually want to hangout with me the next day... But not today
Randomize
