with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
I don't think you know how difficult it is to pee in poncho..
he asked me if i "normally slept like that" because i was curled up in a ball facing the wall. then he told me that i woke up in the middle of the night and said "oh my god. i forgot you were here." how did he not understand that i didn't want him in my bed.
I guess I should mention that I have already fucked the Fed Ex guy.
That changes everything.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
pregamed for the floor meeting. so stoned. i keep thinking my RA is shrinking.
Sitting on an airplane reeking of booze, sex and shame while surrounded by families coming home from Disney. This is not one of my finer moments.
She started howling at the moon. That was pretty much the deal breaker.
Lead with your genitals is the best advice I can give you.
I just held a marble with my kegel muscles for 5 min. You may call me COCKCLAMP 9000!!!!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'll be home next weekend. Its mothers day. Let's party just enough so we are frightened it might be our first
So apparently my mom hired someone who goes by "DJ Dog Dick" for the family christmas party?
Starting this Monday as I always do
With a desperate plea for help
I wanted to say, you're welcome for your orgasms, thanks for not returning the favor, Needledick
In other news I was masturbating last night and came really fucking hard to the thought of yelling at a customer....
Just fell out of the attic onto the garage floor. Okay but might go for an x ray. Smashed one of the kitchen drawers to bits.
Holy Shit Mom
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