I decided to name my penis gatorade...is it in you?
We stole some shitttt from king sooper's. fuck yeaaa
what did you steal
frozen pizza, cat litter, and preperation H. not much different than my usual grocery list.
Don't you think facebook is a bit pretentious, suggesting friends and all? No facebook, I would NOT like to be friends with a girl whose fiancee I have slept with.
I woke up on my floor...
I woke up with colors of the wind playing on repeat on my laptop...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They wont let us in. Theyve some sort of no Daft Punk costume rule
you were licking his little sister's watercolors and trying to paint with your tongue.
i would rather give Shaq a handjob than take this accounting final
Today in psych we learned that you are a whore.
Me specifically?
Yep.
Confirm for me that it's be a bad idea to sleep with the 50 year old that's currently hitting on me?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm so eating pot-chocolate cookies while preggers. This kid will be so amazing.
Well I almost walked away with an Irish guy's boarding pass and some south guy's dignity
Scratch one off the douchebag bucket list. Just saw a guy in a sesame street tshirt and a tap out hat. Didn't get the memo that big bird's trying to get into mma.
Please come home, i don't want to feel like basket garbage girl but I'm in your alleyway and not sure how to change that.
you kept saying how you wanted to mainline bacardi right into your bloodstream. medical school is doing wonderful things to your brain
Chili is not acceptable fuck buddy food.
Randomize