ps i'm pretty sure i was blacked out when we hooked up? good thing i was w. you and not an actual diddler or an organ harvester
Hahaha. Shut up you were blacked out my ass. U were str8 mixin it up with urs truly like it was ur J-O-B
omg he said he wants to insert his penis into my vagnia what do i say
tell him to stop quoting family guy
I seriously just caught my 15 year old little sister with a positive pregnancy test coming out of the bathroom. Honest to God.
I have a coat hanger and a baseball bat. Her choice.
I learned the names of so many hookups when they read them at graduation
They nicknamed me the gargoyle. Sex with me is getting gargoyled. The last one I fucked yelled "gargoyle me" for dirty talk. I think fucking me is part of their pledging initiation. Somewhat OK with this.
I Can't even believe I threw all my pizza rolls at her, I mean not only did i ruin a good meal but now I dont have anymore
Next time we include dessert condiments into our sex life we can fuck up my sheets. It's only fair.
I hate him. I fucked every one of his friends AND his fat brother and he still won't break up with me.
i know i shouldn't tell you this since i want you to really like me but i just spent the last 4 hours sleeping on the toilet.
are we fucking for lunch or am I using my vibrator ?
it wasn't a total waste of time; I mean how often do you get to play scotch pong?
.....fair enough
NO. FUCK YOU. I HOPE SOMEONE REPLACES YOUR LUBE WITH HOT SAUCE.
I needed to pee, so I climbed out his window
I thought it turned out lovely. You got to see me almost naked and I got to be stoned to the point I was content with
Wtf when were you almost naked??
I can't say too many people would say watching their drunk best friends fuck in a hot tub is very normal.
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