That girl would be great looking if she lost 1000 pounds and cut off her head.
if i died would you start the facebook group?
Like if there was an award for best way to take a girls virginity, he would get a standing ovation. And first prize. Probably a bunch of roses too. That good.
He told me he wanted to show me something beautiful, then just started peeing off the bridge into oncoming traffic
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He's cute when he's drunk, too. Also he tried to fight my door...
Like for real, is your junk ok? I have to look after my investments.
I don't know what was up he just kept sitting in his chair smoking weed and watching home movies all night it was weird as fuck.
Looks like a took a video of myself beating off and passed out last night. I'm classy.
guy at the bar just asked how many cows we have on our land, then proceeds to ask me out. you know your from the country when....
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Morning! Im using your rent money to snort percocet.
Literally, and I mean LITERALLY as in "not to be confused with a casual hyperbole", LITERALLY the day we broke up she slept with 3 different guys that night.
1) It's nice to see that the whole "English Major" thing is upping the quality of your rants 2) Have you considered that your dick was the cork holding her sluttiness in?
I will consider it. I need to determine if ogling him is worth almost certain death via zipline.
I woke up the whole house screaming I need my shorts they found me in the kitchen with a bag of strawberries naked
So apparently last night while I was drunk I read him erotic fanfiction while he was eating me out. He stopped every now and then to give me feedback.
Why is there an inflatable flamingo in the backseat of my car?
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