well since you're still married, you will be paying for my abortion right?
This glow in the dark vibrator will get me through this power outage
There's half of a squirrel in the bathtub - i figured you'd be the one to go to.
i'm surprised you didn't wake up. like i literally came when he was fingering me as i was spooning with you and all you did was mumble "that's a good idea, mom" and pull the sheets away from me.
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let's be real here, you have a beautiful vagina. this kid is a doctors son. that's a remedy for beautiful rich grandkids. he is just trying water his family tree, and make sure he doesn't end up in some piece of shit adult home. go for it.
My biggest accomplishment thus far this summer is having sex 5 weeks after hip surgery.
She cracked her neck before the blowjob and I knew shit just got real.
low point in my life last night. licked pizza grease off my iphone screen..
I spent the entire night stroking his hair. He was cool with it. Never thought a ginger stoner would help me work through my social anxiety but here we are.
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But like now I know, men who are vegetarians are significantly worse in bed.
You fell in the corner and refused to get up unless someone helped you. And then you crawled under the pool table and took a nap.
I'm currently on a bowling date with my girlfriend and her boyfriend. It's pretty fun.
He once bought a dildo and put fifty dollars and a happy anniversary note in the battery compartment I gotta lock him down while hes available
Don't EVER mix a flaming shot, with a Jello shot.. As good as it sounds flaming Jello is not a good idea
also. when i get a car, the amount of space there is for sex WILL be a huge deciding factor.
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