Michelle and I recorded her bunny humping it's little rubber black ball.
saw you walking with that piece of shit
and that piece of shit just read that
I mean, she is a dancer for the Suns. If I didnt fuck her that would just be bad team spirit.
He cut you off when you said Paula Dean was in your soul...He kicked you out when "Paula" started eating random peoples food
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you screamed santa and jumped in front of 50 kids to tell him you wanted a bong for christmas.
Should we discuss the rug burns on my back or just save that for a separate conversation
Still had my bottle opener ring on. Started to give him a hand job. LOL
Thank God I didn't lose my virginity to that asshole. That woulda been like winnin a raffle ticket for a free bag of dog shit. But with like a really pretty bag. A pretty bag full of dog shit.
You sent me a picture of you holding a goat then asked me if I would have day sex
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This is my gift to your gina
He handed me a temporary tattoo and said cover the hickey up with this
I still don't know why she was so offended when I emerged from the bathroom and told her my balls were now clean.
She said "we just have chemistry" ... I wanted to say "no, you just have a vagina."
Somehow reaching for the flaming hot cheetos ended up in the best sex of my life
He took home that trashy slut from Bama but a NFL Lineman was just in my DMs so... who’s the real winner here
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