"Take a picture of me motorboating molly" was probably not my best career move
No, pictures of your dick will not make me feel better about my grandmother having a brain tumor.
looking back it was a good thing we were too wasted to fire up the chainsaw
I don't want to die alone with cake watching shows about cake
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
But is that really the name you want to scream out during climax?
Why do you have an empty bottle of port in your bathroom bin?
I can't tell if I have the Pizza Hut shits or beer shits
Yeah. I asked if there was a finger in my ass at some point or if I had a weird dream. So far he hasn't responded
Rule #61 of being a lady: never get fingered by a finger with a knuckle tattoo
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That would be a mascot riding an ATV at a semi-professional hockey game, if that doesn't sum up how I've been I don't know what could
At this point, I'd date an ax murderer. So long as he doesn't cry all the time, have ED, or leave me with his unspayed cat. My list of requirements is becoming increasingly specific.
my confident boosted when he told me that it was I who started making out with him. ME. NOT HIM.
I AM SHOCKED AND PROUD OF MYSELF
He said he wanted to lick the breadcrumbs off my chest
Dude 4th of July week was our like 5th anniversary of you sending me dick pics ❤️
I just hooked up with the German exchange student who doesn't speak English. And you said I have no talent.
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