make any headway on the foot/dick situation?
When are you freeeeeeeeee?
My phone auto corrected that to freeeeeeeeeedoooooooooom. That's kinda awesome.
my life trainwreck boards at 9:30
Got 6 blowjobs in one weekend... new personal best.
Ever since he's come out, my facebook stalking experience has gotten uncomfortable
Hiding in the clothes rack at walmart like a 4 year old. Already scared 3 people. New fav weekend activity
Gave a homeless guy 3 bucks earlier. Just saw him at the bar. He bought one beer and left. Happy to see my 3 dollars was well spent
Call me when your ready for an explanation about the ham in your vagina.
Its only fair we share our golden vaginas with the world. It would be selfish if we didn't.
Yeah. It's just like I have his virginity and he has my shoes and where do we go from here.
His grandma held his dogs so they wouldn't follow me out the door. It was like a whole new level added to my walk of shame.
Hey sorry for calling you so much last night. I mixed your number with the pizza guys, and he was running late
I know. His dick was small at the top and got bigger at the bottom, like a fucking curling wand.
No one with a hairstyle like that is allowed to insult anyone for anything
i could have got laid, but instead, i threw up in her hair. you can cross that off the bucket list.
Randomize