hell yes lets make some ravioli
i just used a pokemon card to do blow. i need an adult. now.
my grandma just told me that size does matter, and don't let anyone tell you anything different.
A kid wearing a Batman belt buckle in my psych class just asked how people get pee fetishes. I'm too high for this.
You've eaten a Lean Pocket for every meal for at LEAST 3 days now. Get your life in line.
Its official. Girls from Indiana do not give rim jobs.
Sunday is a myth, I refuse to believe that I waste an entire day unable to function after a night of drinking.
it's just one of those nights where i don't care if anyone sees my vagina
Just described your amazing cock to a complete stranger. I am officially the worst wingman (chick) ever.
Don't. You get on the 18 year old. I'll get on the 38 year old. Together we will bridge 2 decades of cock.
Zach, it's Lisa from work. Was that you yeiling BALLS DEEP at me on I-25 or is it just something about me that invites that from rando creeps?
I didn't want to have shaved for no reason, so I told him I'd blow him if he would just come over and appreciate the smoothness of my legs.
Though the booty shorts might give me an extra discount. Or arrested. We'll see.
Why can I remember how tall Nicki Minaj is from looking up her height once months ago, yet after weeks into the semester I can't even remember where any my classrooms are located
Importance
Chasing down vodka with apple juice and crying. Alone.
Randomize
