I think I kinda wanna bone that ginger from Harry Potter.
You literally just made my flesh crawl.
i think i would be more confident if i were chinese.
Where'd you guys get the alcohol from?
Oh. Some homeless guy we picked up from I-70. He bought us $400 worth of alcohol in exchange for a shower.
...... wtf.
This is working out surprisingly well considering it started out with us using a christmas tree as a battering ram
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I'm using my ex boyfriends dog to find a guy at the park I could see fuck buddy potential in. I'm the queen of irony.
The bouncer yelled at him for poking at the guy selling roses, I think it's time to leave.
i had to sit with a fan pointed directly to my vag for a good 10 minutes
Liver, I have supported you for 18 fucking years. Pull your weight for ONE NIGHT and detoxify this alcohol.
I tried to convince the Lobo Card people to take my pic with my sunglasses on because I will probably always be this hungover.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah you insisted everyone watch Space Jam at 2 in the morning then you cried the whole way through it. You were the very worst kind of drunk.
I told him if he went to see magic mike with me I'd cover his eyes during the penis parts
Not drinking has really freed up a lot of my time. I made a bracelet yesterday. I miss bars.
Is it socially acceptable to break up with someone over snapchat?
Dude too much vodka. I think I just puked up my heart
That's what you get for taking that guy home. The god of sluttiness is frowning upon you.
Burnt my boob on a piece of hot waffle at work today..I feel like thats a new low point in my career..
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