I think I'm going to start texting all the people that don't want to talk to me
I got oddly confused when she started talking in third person in bed.
I am like the Mr. Miyagi of queefs.
you used progresso chicken soup as a mixer last night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
hapi new year, hope this year brings u happiness and lots of sexi people ;)
stop writing like that.
Ran into my prostitute at Costco yesterday. She was with her boyfriend, I was with my kids. Awwwwkward.
disregard all texts ive sent you minus taco motherfucking bell
He's the kind of drunk guy that would pee in your mouth while you give him head.
The rest of us are chipping in to soundproof your bedroom. This is getting ridiculous.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Are you drunk? Because I am and if you're not, this may be very awkward in the morning
Thats for me to know and you to find out.
I told her the only thing I had going for me was my huge cock. She said she was willing to overlook my other shortcomings.
Oh you have the munchies, Dad? That's great and congratulations on the weed but STOP EATING MY APPLE PIE
These cutoffs are too tight but my ass looks like Freedom
Do you ever get high and look at your cat and feel like you know them on an intellectual level?
I would accept a super bowl ring as an engagement ring
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