Mr ***** is in bed with his super hot wife giving her 18 inches of pleasure
Bret has after-school detention for writing Brianna has a stinky vag on the ground at recess.
dude sorry but u no that when a guys 'likes' ur pic on facebook it only means he was just jacking off to it.
i knew she was high when she broke up the cookies into her glass of milk and ate it like cereal
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Do you think my parents will accept my drinking habits more if I told them I like to drink every night because I take good shits the next morning?
My roommate just got home. Made an entire package of bacon. Ate it. And then went to bed.
He just made me apologize because his morning wood is NOT a laughing matter.
I just threw up blood. Also i just remembered i got hit in the face with a 2 by 4.
The cops raided her house the day before class even started
Those assholes are becoming so efficient
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
At least you get to smell pizza at your job. I just smell despair all day long.
you said "how could you not want to hook up with me when I have these abs" and then proceeded to rip your shirt off in the middle of the bar. I'm pretty sure you were hammered.
JESUS
Well I was kicked out of the bar and woke up on a picnic table. I'd say the night was awesome!
Sexiest use of a semi colon this week, congratulations.
Idk my boobs are big but i dont think theyre hide a flask in them big..
Is it too forward if I ask him to bring a condom when he comes over to work on our project?
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