A joint and a Nerds Rope = breakfast of champions for the unemployed
I was staring at you from my window across the quad. I wanted to let you know so it's not creepy
Is it normal that I have to take off my pants to get mouth stitches removed?
I chose taco bell over sex...
good choice.
call of duty 2 was the straight man's twilight
Until last night, I had never actually thrown up ON a sandwich
As long as he sees me topless I don't care. Redemption. REEEDDDEMMMPPPTTIIIOOONNNNN
heres the thing, we have 120 cans of beer left in the fridge. until thats finished we cant fit food in the fridge
Last thing I remember clearly was, "ok, but if we're are gonna get drunk before class, there's no half-doing this"
How do you tell an ex that banging less hot chicks than me is highly insulting? I almost want to try and get him laid with a pretty girl just to save some face for dating him so long.
Just found out i over drew my checking account on a 711 hot dog
Do u remember buying that
I remember eating it on the curb like a drunken hobo
so it took us like 45 minutes to get into the party.... then when we wanted to leave we were blocked and forced to stay.
....you got kicked INTO a party??
I'm high. The text bubbles floating do no justice to the underwater experiences
I wish I had a Tina from Bob's Burgers in real life. She would be the best wingman.
She calls him the walking dildo to his face. That relationship is already fucked up.
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