I just gave my patient permission to swallow while pregnant. She was so embarrassed to ask...but her bf was really happy with the answer.
Just a heads up: The party is Fourth of July themed. Spread the word
dude its may
Work with me here, man.
So the bar isnt gonna put that broken window on my tab. appaerently they want cash
She put up a picture of her grandmother on facebook, looks like the lazy eye runs in the family
The dentist told me I have super glue on my teeth. I'm not blaming you I just want to know how that happened
Straight up if I get stuck with her I'm going to drink myself into a prison cell.
Fair warning: We've transformed the living room into a giant tent.
I don't even see the point of going over to his place dressed anymore.
I hope you fall on your chin.
Jealousy makes you ugly.
I'm not going to pass up the opportunity to be half naked and covered in glitter without facing judgement or legal prosecution. I'll be there.
I went by my nickname in rehab. It made it feel more like summer camp.
Being in the club with your moms drunk friends > having a healthy relationship with your mom
Your roommates will be treating you to many anecdotes about my intentions to have aggressive sex with you. I'm sorry in advance.
Did I try to sell your body for chicken tenders last night?
Damn that sucks I haven't needed pants the whole time i've been here
My parents left me the house for the weekend...you know what that means?!
Harry Potter marathon and no pants.
Randomize
