so i know my style isnt the best ever but u should have told me i was wearing two different shoes
she had condoms in her med. cabinet - magnums -I don't think I'm tall enough for this ride
Then he told me he was 40. I'm not sure if I have enough Daddy issues to go for it
using the left over highlighters from the blacklight party to study for finals. feeling the need to write insert penis here on my econ notes.
dude. we need more in our fridge then just beer and applesauce.
I want him to be my next love. So I'm taking it slow
As in ill only blow him next week
When I start carrying a bottle in my hand, jumping from boat to boat with a grenade horn. YOU should know this isn't going to turn out well.
Everyone already knows you're a drunk, they understand.
nothing says 4th of july like teaching grandma how to work a keg
I'm lying here drinking water from a shot glass..moving is not an option right now
I told her shower beers are even better when you have someone in there with you and she said she's been looking for a new drinking buddy. It's a goooooo
I saw a classic trojan enz laying on his desk. So he's probably not into the kinky shit.
quickly learned not to sleep with your roommate and work colleague in the same week
I got so pissed i stormed off and threw his burrito on his windshield
all i'm saying is don't blame me if your purses are filled with whoppers
are we talking malt balls or BK?
he said he only had one rule...that he'd only go down on me 3x a day. so far this is turning into the best relationship ever.
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