so as we were driving to pick up my grandma from old navy she procedes to yell into our open window.. "I'll make ya holla fo a dolla" umm...
I got a 69.7 in accounting. I have this whole doing the bare minimum down to a science
It's not every day you get to see a girl fuck herself with a pickle.
By the way, turns out "Danny B" is his penis. Not his cousin. I was right.
seriously, i am too high for the omelet station to be playing Being For The Benefit Of Mr Kite at 7am
Woke up to a huge puddle of water in the living room floor, apparently I made an indoor snowman.
I pretty much envision me eating a turkey leg whilst fucking you. I have priorities.
Come get her ASAP. She's "people bowling," which is just her rolling into random groups of people. People look pissed.
it's gotten to the point where there are no existing good choices. even our good choices are bad choice by anyone's standards but ours.
If you do wifi you would be helping my penis out & real friends care about their friends penises...
Just to circumvent as much mood-killing as possible, you are allowed a small amount of laughter at my pubic hair. Too much and I revoke your vagina privileges until you can get your shit together.
Guess what I'm doing tonight? Tacos and strip chess.
It's has to do with my genitals. Don't ask.
Kinda. I got kicked outta the bar, and then incited a riot until the cops came and I bailed
I've been trying to fall asleep with ice packs covering my vagina for the last hour... Sorry for being vulgar. I'm going to kill myself.
Randomize
