Lavender boy was great at seduction and crappy in bed.
Made out with some random "plus sized" young lady. She let me kiss her boobies. It was like I was 6 months old again.
kill, fuck, marry: alice cullen, hermione granger, ginny weasley.
damn... fuck alice for sure, I feel bad but i think I have to say marry ginny... and kill hermoine! I can't believe I'm answering this right now.
New major. Tourism Management. I dont know what it is but it sounds like something all the stupid slutty failed business management majors do.
New development. Drinking at work is so easy and awesome I might have to do it everyday.
CHAZ BONO WILL BE ON THE NEXT SEASON OF DANCING WITH THE STARS.
Internet Is back!
MY NEWS TRUMPS YOURS.
Legitimate concern. Who am I going to have birthday sex with?
I guess the study abroad went badly, I gave him a joint and he just smoked it and cried all the way from the airport
Do you know how I hurt my ankle or my shoulder? Or the origin of any of the following mystery bruises: left quad, left wrist, right elbow. Thanks for playing.
Sometimes you get drunk and fall out of a car. I never said it was glamorous.
Why were my jeans in the freezer of the mini fridge, and how long have they been in there? On another note, I found my teacher's ID badge.
Give me an out of order sign and caution tape and we can have sex practically anywhere.
He radiates elegant sexual dominance. I bet even his balls have pinstripes.
A girl showed up in my tinder and I have it set to only men... I super liked her because I need a lesbian experience
Do I masturbate or eat a pound of matazah. Alissa help what do I do??
Randomize
