Just mADE A PArabola og urine
That's what happens when you let Keystone Light make your decisions.
Nights of college: 1. Virgins: 1. Yes.
did you mean anything you said last night? i just wnna know
no
dude i just made a burrito by wrapping 2 packs of scooby snacks with a fruit roll up. im so high
UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
so why was i the only one who woke up with ham stuck to my ass?
I think im gonna bang this 35 year old at a kids birthday party in the bathroom at this house while the kids open the presents.
She said, "awww, you're so sweet" after I started putting on a condom. How many STDs have I just contracted?
So apparently they remodeled our middle school. Looks like we'll need to find a new roof to play beer pong on this summer.
I'll be there with bells on. And by "bells" I mean "jäger bombs". And by "on" I mean "being poured down my gullet".
The only rule I'm making for myself tonight is to not drink out of the sink at the bar.
I can't believe he's mad at you for not remembering your fake anniversary.
That ass isn’t going to eat itself.
He was actually surprised when I poured myself a glass full of straight vodka. Clearly he doesn't know me as well as he thinks.
Randomize
