remember that night jesus turned water into wine? DRUNKER.
Totally saw a hot amputee. I think this is called character growth.
I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
My roommate just did the walk of shame in last nights corset back to our room to find her dad there. THATS why i go to school out of state.
He about cried when I ordered pizza online. He said it was a miracle.
Registered sex offender is the model in class today.... There are too many things wrong with him getting naked in front of a lot of college students.
The druken crowd just broke into singing "God Bless America" while waiting the newlyweds to get in the limo. My friend is eating rose petals.
we found him passed out on the baseball field with two 40oz and wearing a tophat.
Where did he get the tophat?
It's getting harder and harder to find People to carry her home
She shouldn't drink
I added a U.S. Senator on snapchat....casual.
The girl in the hotel room next to us walked out at the same time as me this morning. She just shook her head, looked at me and said, "faker." Is it that easy to tell?!??
Sex on the trampoline with your two best friends cheering you on: PRICELESS.
Had a moment of weakness, slept with my ex last night
So that's why our room smells like tequila and shame.
You fell while talking to a cop, then proceeded to acuse him of tripping you... he was arresting you for public intox.
Its nights like last night that make me want to high five my liver.
Randomize