I recorded his drunk dial calls. My personal favorite was the one that began, "grab the bull by the horns and fuck his cock."
She has 2500 facebook friends. I probably should have used a condom.
You know you're deprived when the only thing you taste while chewing gum is the 2 grams of sugar alcohol.
My professor just told me I'm living a lie and I found puke on my pants. How do you think it's going?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
pain. pain everywhere. this is why throwing yourself at concrete is a bad idea.
Your stoned with a 2 year old in the room....and that makes you want to have babies?!
His dick looks just like him, taller than average, thick, and somehow always angry.
He left in the middle of the night, he left his shoes behind and stole my doc martens..size 6 female. Wtf?
Your smile makes me feel like I'm frolicking through a field of gummy bears.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Omg have I shown you my skeezy ex fiancée?
The other one.
Mike's my new hero. There's a flagpole of hook-up's bras on his porch and a week's supply of beer in his fridge but he still has a great job.
He was 6'5 and wearing a kilt, how could I not fuck him
please come back. it's turned into strip rock paper scissors
I think the cats may be lesbians. It could just be a two hour mutual bath but it sure looks like a 69.
He’s older
Like “has a job and pays his bills” older or “still watches porn on DVD because he can’t figure out the Internet” older?
Randomize