What's the politest way to tell someone that you're only interested in them when they're naked, and even then it's just like a passing "meh?"
I thought this kinda shit only happens to ugly people
I remember asking you "need some dick tonite?"
Yeah I guess to me frat party equals penis party. oh the wonders of vodka.
rubbing her clit was like playing thumb war
She was ugly to the point i wanted to brush my teeth after looking at her
you asked a group of latinas stood by the bar to hold a minutes silence for ugly betty getting cancelled. that drunk.
Being back home for the summer opens up so many opportunities to have sex without increasing my number
hey you knew what you were in for when i showed up with 2 fifths of Jim. plus i left money to pay for a new sink
Second night spent with creepy guy. I either need to change his nickname or stop doing this.
Dude, I found out having naked people in your car is a felony.. Now were all fucked.
Fuckin wine wasted last night. Found my pants in the toilet this morning.
dude, she has my telletubby sweats and my good sweatshirt hostage, I can't risk their safety with a breakup
Ok sry I left that ambiguous......did you want contact solution or fellatio?
You really need to stop getting injured so often it's really starting to negatively impact my sex life. Oh and get well soon. . . no seriously though hurry the fuck up.
Last night I realized I made a dick appt 2 MONTHS IN ADVANCE!!!!....... WHO THE HELL DOES THAT!?!? LMAO!
Randomize
