yes i saw that this morning. it was my mailbox.
So it's like pop-o-matic trouble, but with penises
Note to self: when drunk try to remember that ctrl, alt and dance doesnt exist on a keyboard.
I have jerked off in every room in your house. *the more you know
TINY HANDS NOT FOR BUTTHOLES
This is going everywhere on the internet.
To my wonderful winter break booty calls: thank you for making this holiday season enjoyable. I look forward to seeing you boys again this summer.
If I'm going to risk life and limb to wear a Wings jersey to the Garden next week, the least they can do is win.
And the most would be ending up in bed with one of them.
Let's be real. I'm the Usain Bolt of running away after hookups. Fastest (wo)man alive.
Let's be honest, I've seen a decent amount of dicks in my life and very few of them have been worth all the trouble.
I never imagine I'd say this, but can I ask Jeff for the butt plugs back even though it was a gift and we broke up?
Maybe i don’t have a tell. Maybe wine is my poker face.
She bruised my penis again. But, trooper I am we kept on going.
Pride log, day two. Noticing more bruises and scrapes. Liver functions probably very lowered.
I wish I had a tail.
Why?
...why not?
Still drunk, heading to class.
It's 3 a.m. Dude
Doesn't mean I'm not at my desk. Ill wait.
Randomize
