summer is not the time to consider going full bush.
i think i may have caused an international incident at the french embassy, just fyi
hahaha how?
its a long story involving a horse trailer and some shrubbery
When we made out her lip\nose ring fell out in my mouth. Awkward?
no one will drink with you if you continue to listen to beyonce
the bar tender told me i could keep an air matress in the backroom.
Well, he sent me "techno kitty adventure" about 10 minutes ago. So, he could be anywhere.
Puking green right now......... jaimison mcflurry very bad idea
Girl on the bus just slammed her book shut, turned to me and said "I'm way to fucking high to be studying"
Realistically anyone can come I don't care it's Boston what do I own boston? No. I just don't want people who are gonna give me "why are you doing that" kinda look when I take birthday shots out of my birthday babe shot glass necklace.
She called me her guardian angel after I picked her phone up from the river of pee coming from her front porch.
I don't know where he learned to eat pussy but I thought I was going blind
My parents just told me that if I stop drinking I could do something great with my life...
They obliviously haven't seen you dance on top of a pool table then
She has "Massive Shits" listed as a turn off. That's very specific and there's a story behind it I bet.
Sweet, got a date tomorrow night
Nothing says happy valentines day like waking up to a naked man you hooked up with taking a walk of shame
Let's make an agreement. No drugs until you finish all your homework. I'm hiding them as we speak.
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