Its about time the women of america have a president they can masturbate to again
glow-in-the-dark stars on his ceiling from '98 totally make blowing him more romantic.
my coke dealer is running a Black Friday special
you definitely made a grilled cheese using your iron..
ya and it worked didnt it??
They were done having sex when I went to the room. They had that look on their faces.
Disappointment?
We're gonna take a moment of silence to pray... that his penis is as pretty and as talented as his brothers.
I fucked a 6'7 Danish man. In the ocean. At 5am. Greetings from Florida!
I distinctly remember seeing your nipples from the deck.
Instead of medicine they should just give ecstasy. Also I'm tingly and can't find u guys. A gay man just said he loved me... :( / :)
She just asked me if I was looser "in the vagina" than her. While gyrating.
She just mixed her Emergen-C with champagne... Vegas here we come!
I miss the days where our biggest worries were who was gonna win battle shits.
Had a dream I went to Disney to visit you and then I got really drunk and puked all over these little kids in line
I can't believe I'm coordinating a threesome at work. My productivity is at an all time low.
You can help me! We'll make an occasion of it. Have some rum, make some smores, condemn the email system to the pits of hell...
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