No it only became awkward when she walked in with her new boyfriend and we realized we'd all banged her
You're having sex and i just smoked and made oatmeal...i'll give you some time to be jealous
If you dedicate your next bite to me, I'll dedicate my first orgasm to you.
She was doing lines off of her friends boobs in the limo at 9 oclock on a thursday This has the potential to be the best weekend ever
A very small part of me wants you to appreciate me for more than just my breasts. But the rest of me is breasts.
"The juvenile turned and faced the officer, unzipped his pants, placed a fresh cigarette in between his legs and preceded to light it with a match"
I feel like I have African malaria. I just remembered singing Teenage Dream in full to that biker couple at the bar.
Welp I just blew a load probably the size of a small pond if not a lake
Who the fuck is this
He bought me a oreo ice cream cake with "thanks for not calling the cops!" written in icing. If that doesn't sum up winter break, I don't know what does.
My hope for you over spring break is that you can be some disease free girl's random spring break mistake.
Yeah. Just jump him. Naked. Claim his dick for yourself.
Is she okay?
She may want to issue revenge punches, but medically fine.
Both of us came out of our rooms at the same time in boxers and sat on the couch. No words were spoken.
I walked into the living room this morning and he was there with 3 shots in a row. He said it was "tea time."
was his pinky out?
What has my life become? I'be officially recruited my fuck buddy for help getting my ex back.
I just want to feed you taquitos and play with your boner and live happily ever after
Randomize
