you were so high that you made a 14 page PowerPoint on why Santa would beat Peter pan in a fight.
and I must say, you were very persuasive
thought i was the most hungover person in class until i saw a kid puke into his bookbag...he wins
Lets just not get arrested. That might put a damper on everything. I only say that cause i've almost been arrested.
We role played last night. I was Brandon Inge and she was some slut from Toledo. Let's just say Triple A might not be so disappointing after all.
once again, we need to groom him to be a better human being. using liquor and tits.
Every time I stand up, gravity punches me in the tits. This is horrible.
Was that your vagina? Received a text pic from a number I didn't recognize. Shaved, so no hair color cues. But it looked like your lips.
Boys that pee in my bed don't get happy birthday wallposts on facebook
Dude. Yeah. This is a game changer. I feel dirty and possibly pregnant and it hasn't happened yet.
Woke up on the stairs at my parents house. Good start to vacation.
I'm going back to his house to watch wreck it Ralp.
Hey, Monsters Inc. got me laid. Disney man, who knew it leads to sex.
I don't know whether to laugh it off or be pissed at him..I got pulled over this morning leaving his place and the officer thought my hickeys were hand prints around my neck and asked if I needed to be escorted out of town.
he went to the bathroom at 5am only to come back and squeeze my boob before going back to sleep
I've been with my family a total of 20 minutes and I'm ready to go on a bender. This is going to be a long weekend.
We're playing drunken roulette. We're taking exlax followed by shots. First person to shit themselves loses!
Randomize
