Would it be horrible to send my ex's girlfriend an email telling her that I sexed her man up so dirty that he fell asleep inside of me afterwards?
bahahahaha i would laugh soo hard if someone did this for me hahahaha this guy would become my best friend
In hindsight, i should have predicted that a drink called the 'rocky mountain bear fucker' would not end in a pleasant experience
i wish we had vans that drove around at night but insteand of ice cream and jolly tunes its taco bell and the macarena
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You made a list of reasons why you should be on fear factor. You came up with 2 reasons: "I like fear" and "I am fear"
We did however see an 87 year old guy die and get resuscitated last night at the bar. He then finished his beer and his game of pool.
There is literally a guy in my class with a gallon of water and a trophy.
Her bed is on wheels, so we woke up in the kitchen.
It's like I just got slapped in the face with the cock of nostalgia.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm not sure what is worse, the fact that Hoffman doesn't sell vodka before 9am or that I was trying to buy vodka at 8:30am.
All's fair in love and war. and tinder.
He wants to buy us a microwave. Clearly the man is going to fix my life.
Send me a picture of our booze closet. I'm homesick.
Well, I told him that it's not all about him. Then I gave him the best blow-job in the history of blow-jobs.
I asked for a cup of water. They gave me tequila. They WANT ME TO DIE
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