Bar. Show boob. Just one. Free drinks. Instant friends
Guys only need one. Little known secret. You're welcome.
i woke up to 115 texts from him all saying "do you love me??"
I feel like Captain Blackout doesn't do her justice. Brigadier General Blackout is much better.
She asked the class if starwars was based on a true story...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she made me take her to the grocery store to buy a gallon of sweet tea and a shit ton of band aids, the cashier asked if someone was hurt and she replied "not yet.."
I'm now at that point where it just feels natural to do a few shots of whisky with breakfast and then head to work
you covered his dog in toothpaste. safe to say hes not gonna call you.
I guess I really am the only person in this world who can successfully have a no-strings-attached threesome on the beach.
I feel like delivery guys should know that when you order lunch for one and answer the door wearing sweatpants, there's no need to say "Happy Valentine's Day."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
On a scale of 1 to "bad descision", where does stealing my racist neighbors dog and giving him my roomates dildo for a chew toy rate?
I've got beer and a bag of saltwater taffy and croutons, is that enough for this typhoon thing?
If you two are having sex, stop. I have something really important to ask you about psychics.
As we have told you before, the first rule of hook-up bingo is we don't talk about hook-up bingo
Once again I let my vagina make the decisions...that and vodka :(
Sorry I’m late. Got horny watching the traffic report and had to rub one out
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