just witnessed a squirrel raping another squirrel. i couldn't look away.
the star wars geek is hitting on me, and is talking about his lightsaber. need back up NOW
its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
You love popeyes more than me
does delicious chicken come out of your vagina?
Tell me why Im cashing out of Walmart with Smirnoff and catfood
It's official. I am the proud owner of his very own sex tape. Amateur awesome porn or awful delete-me-now porn? Come over help me decide.
Found: medium sized pair of mens pants tucked inside my purse w/ a dry cleaners coupon in left pocket. Call if you wish to claim the coupon
I have pink band-aids all over my body, WHAT HAPPENED?
Keg backpack and a Bike
Having boobs is probably the greatest thing in the world, free booze all around
He walked up to anal ring toss like he was going to win you a teddy bear
Do we have to do this party tonight? I'm worried my bed will miss me...
I really prefer to do my walks of shame in the summer
She walked up to me and whispered "I hope you're good at sex" and led me to the beach.
Slept in and having coffee. No sounds of whipping and no veiny dildos next to me. This is good. How's your mornin?
But really, what kind of hoe life adventure in Mexico would you do that would top me blowing a trucker?
Randomize
