I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
I'm sorry for the crack den comment. You have a lovely apartment.
She is totally STD
Is it a bad omen that my phone auto corrects dtf to STD
I'm just not sure how to initiate the "do you want to have sex with my boyfriend and I" conversation
I am officially out of liquor stores within a 15 mile radius that don't recognize me as soon as I walk in the door.
u know how some weekends you just wanna go out and ruin a relationship? this is one of those weekends
I have a cut on my head from a tambourine.
I feel like, for the first time today, we had a healthy yolo.
if memory serves, the guy you were hooking up with said he was a slutty skittle.
Let's get drunk and put things on the grill that have no right to be there.
Happy birthday, America.
No I don't want to see you. You're the reason that I'm going to need a new liver by the time I'm 30.
Hey. Im sorry to bother you but I just watched the seinfield episode about faking an orgasm and it caused me to second guess myself. Were you satisfied?
If I could drink as much and have the amount of sex he has at his age, well I'd probably be dead
He plays guitar, sings like an angel, and acts like a gentleman. If I don't fuck him by the end of first semester, I'm dropping out
If you gave someone an std. would you say a muffin basket, a candy gram or an edible arrangement is a better choice to send them?
Randomize
