was i over the top when i said that i wished they made v-neck pants to her?
she's basically destroyed all of the faith i had that skinny blond girls could be a functioning part of society.
he wrote Vegans should suck on cow dick on her wall with permanent marker. thats how he got the black eye
Just watched my manager erase "we've been 2 days wo an accident" and change it to "0" these ppl are too high.
i've never seen someone face fit so perfectly in a toilet bowl
The last thing I remember is him grabbing my ass and telling me he knew where the jello shots were, so I followed him.
When he came downstairs he looked at me like I was attempting to rob his house.
Did you reintroduce yourself?
He threatened to call the cops.
if you ever get a chance to, fuck in a lecture hall. great acoustics. highly recommend it.
My body is like , remember when you wouldn't let me puke last night? Good luck at work fucker.
i'm hungover but need to study so i had a vodka orange juice, three ibuprofen and an adderall for breakfast. what up med school
I AM AT THE LOUNGE WHERE THEY FILMED THE LAP DANCE IN SHOWGIRLS....IT IS AMAZING
Do you remember ripping my condom off last night while yelling "I DEMAND MY MEAT RAW" like a Viking?
Can't believe we're making vacation plans with the guy we had a threesome with
Dude, no, you tried to sleep on the stove. I mean. You were pissed when I stopped you... but I couldn't have you catching on fire in my house.
I mean, I'm not hammered, but I definitely can't show my face or tits in that bowling alley again
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