butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
Yeah, getting the HI-fiVe would really put a damper on my whoring around.
Ugh I just know that when I take off his pants his underwear will have Megan's Law written all over them.
Update: no underwear. Greeeeen light.
I faked it too. I just spit on your bed.
Fuck it dude, we gotta bounce before she starts talking about her steve irwin conspiracy
Just found bacon bits in my pocket. Blackout buffet is the best.
He was saying things like "cum for me like a good girl" and "put my entire python I like to call a dick in your mouth" .. Okay I might have changed that one a bit
Your mother liked my album on facebook that's only filled with drunk pictures. I don't know what to feel about this
Aw don't be embarrassed. It was all good fun! We've all been there. You can't come to vegas and NOT get a little alcohol poisoning. That's like going to church and not praying.
Now some guy that's in my phone as " Alex lip ring hot" is texting me and I don't where life is taking me
1. I'm excited for tonight 2. Do we dress up as pirates? 3. Happy Valentine's Day bae
Thanks for letting me cross "getting high at park with children" off my bucket list
I know I drink too much cuz "ssssjllapph peneinssesss" automatically comes up in my phone now.
is caitlin alive?
ya she's alive she's watching a movie
ok remind her she drank toilet water then.
We're sitting on the kitchen floor drinking and talking about mounting real light sabers to the dog's head.
Randomize
