My nipple is on Facebook.
I heard Topanga got a DUI. I need that mugshot asap.
Can we please not be like these pathetic people in their thirties who only get drunk when they go see Sherrill Crow?
hes like my own personal sex toy i use him on the weekends and then i have the option to put him away all week
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hey Im running from the cops. hiding in a bush. when you're approaching the intersection honk the horn twice and I will come out.
I need to stop drunkenly getting naked. I'm losing all my favorite party clothes.
Hey my vagina is like a company. Everyone has an equal opportunity....
its not like i called off work either time for the purpose of tripping, it was more like well, i have nothing to do now today, there is acid and im only human.. but twice
Hey I didn't mean to be all lemme get with your ex husband.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Not going to lie: not even the fact I'm wearing men's cargo pants can hide the fact I have an awesome ass.
I sucked his dick by a creek, how romantic.
yeah the cops just showed up and they got there ass handed to them at beer pong.
But I thought it was so funny last night
You also thought you were a gypsy mermaid last night
We ran out of vodka, so instead of body shots you wanted to do cupcake shots off her naked body...happy birthday to you.
I thought I was drunk because I kept grabbing his arm instead of his dick
But then I realized it wasn’t his arm and that I was very lucky
Randomize